Wednesday, June 9, 2021

How I lost 100 pounds with "fattitude" adjustment

Hello welcome to the meeting, lol! Today I'll talk about how I lost 100 pounds with "fattitude" adjustment. No you didn't read that wrong. And you're probably wondering what the heck a "fattitude" is. It's a word I coined to describe my attitude about being fat, prior to weight loss. It's a manifestation of what Al-Anon calls stinkin thinkin. This obesity mindset if you will is part low self-esteem, part body image dysmorphia and part nasty attitude of self-pity that caused me to make excuses for my obesity. 

Low self-esteem is directly attributable to obesity, if you comfort eat to feel better. A constant feeling of failure made me sluggish and exhausted. I hated not just that I was overweight. I hated and was ashamed of myself overall. It shows in pictures of me before and after weight loss. I looked awkward and miserable because I was. This stinkin thinkin almost killed me, but thanks to Al-Anon and my higher power. 

It also led to the body image dysmorphia part of my fattitude, which was kind anorexia and kind of the opposite. It's not only slender people who have anorexia (body image dysmorphia). Overweight people struggle to see themselves clearly. I had always seen myself as fat. But I also didn't recognize my own obesity and waited a long time to lose weight. 

Before I lost 100 pounds, clearly, I had some stinkin thinkin. Even after weight loss, I still have some issues with anorexia. I'm often afraid to eat because I'm terrified of going back to overweight. I continue to work to lose weight, but also the fattitude. I keep on keeping on as Al-Anon says. 

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