How I lost 100 pounds without gastric bypass: Happy Heart February Weight Loss Challenge

 Hello friends of this blog on how I lost 100 pounds without gastric bypass or weight loss drugs. Each  month I issue a new weight loss challenge to help us all lose weight, maintain weight loss and just be healthier overall. This month is Happy Heart February weight loss challenge. 

I call this a "weight loss" challenge because many people come here to learn how I lost 100 pounds without gastric bypass and what they can do to lose weight. But I'm writing for anyone who wants to be healthier, regardless of weight. The things I share aren't just for people who are overweight. They can even help someone who wants to gain weight because a lot of what I focus on is mental health. 

In Happy Heart February we're going to explore how emotional health drives physical issues. I rounded out January with posts on self-care, or lack thereof, and its impact on obesity, weight loss, body image, self-image and much more. This month I'm looking at ways to care for our hearts, the inside feels ones as much as the pump ones. To do this I need to tell a two-part story. 

Part one:

I grew up neglected, exploited and manipulated by adults charged with protecting me. I didn't learn how to care for myself or even that I should. I have empath tendencies and that was capitalized on. I cared too much, too hard and too long for too many people and not enough for myself. I was worked like an  adult and parent. I now know this parentification is dangerous and inappropriate. Then, it was just doing my job. Obeying everyone was being the "good girl" God expected me to be. 

These and other guilt and shame tactics destroyed any ability I had to protect myself. I lived in constant  remorse, anxiety, shame and fear of failure. God was not loving but draconian taskmaster who expected little girls take everyone's crap. I was only worth what I could provide. That I had to earn basic necessities including love. Which, no matter how hard I tried I never achieved. 

Whether I was an empath or just a very easily guilted child, I don't know. But the result was the same. I've heard empaths described as having no skin. We lack a protective layer that separates us from the feelings, wants, needs and issues of others.  We don't know where others stop and we begin. We absorb others' toxicity into our cells, because we don't know that we shouldn't. And, in my case, were actually told that we should. We exist only to serve.  

We learn to ignore cues and warning messages from our mind, heart, body and soul, which God (the real one, not the fake one I knew) provides to keep us safe. We end up with "emotional leprosy" as our confused, damaged nerves no longer protect us from pain and injury. Our conflicted mind-heart  sabotages our health, peace, security and comfort. We die internally. 

So that's the heart-breaking first part. If any of this resonates, I'm so sorry. But the good news is that it doesn't end there. In part two, we explore ways to mend our broken hearts. To literally grow some skin to save us from the "slings and arrows" that are killing us. We'll consider ways to turn a wounded heart into a happy one. 

Stay tuned for more on how I lost 100 pounds and am finding peace of mind and joy of heart.